B-School Creatures

Hey guys!

How is it going?

First of all, thanks but no thanks for a new name, Ricky Bahl (a few people have rechristened me, lately). I am neither a conman nor I have that charm. There is no connection whatsoever except for the fact that the movie is releasing on my Birthday. I would have preferred Ricky Ponting. Though, I kind of, hate him too.

Well, it’s about 5 months now, since I am in a relationship with this city and institute. And like any relationship, in about 5 months you start recognizing patterns.  Interesting thing about identifying patterns is, some of them give you that much needed edge; some are just useful for giving gyan while for others you wish, you should not have discovered them at the first place. Anyways, oops it’s ANYWAY ,(as I was corrected by someone only to find out that even I was correct, but just informally, that too only in US and Canada) this last sentence has got nothing to do with the post, just wanted to make a point. Yeah, I know it is incorrect usage of anyway. Anyways, it should be “By the way.”  

Please continue reading, even I am still trying to figure out, what I meant exactly. The following part is far more interesting and much simpler to understand.

Based on the traits, personality types, preferences and behaviours, I have classified B-schools students into following categories. Read it and tell me which one are you?

SWAN (Fancy item)

These are the ones who wear expensive clothes. They reply in English irrespective of the language in which the question was asked. They crave for attention and usually get it too. They socialize only with other swans but sometimes mistake a crow for a swan. Generally, they don’t have much money but they give an impression that they own a Rolls Royce. Usually, a female swan falls for a male swan and vice versa.

CROW (The Wannabe fancy item)

These have characteristics similar to swan except for the fact that everything they do have got WANNABE written all over it, that too in upper case. They wear expensive looking clothes and have an accent which will make a BPO guy jealous of them. They speak in English even with a guy/girl from their own region. They socialize only with other crows, and at times with swans, if they get lucky. They too crave for attention and rarely get that. They can’t take down even a simple definition without asking questions. They literally worship swans.

TIGER (The Prince)

These are genuinely good people. They have the money but not the attitude. They are usually quite witty. They never ask stupid question for class participation marks. They are weak in English but great at building relationships. They are the ones who own an Apple or a Blackberry but use them only for texting and calling.

LION (The King)

This species is extinct in some colleges. The basic difference between a lion and a tiger is 20 lakhs their fathers have paid to get them a seat in college along with a license to do whatever they want. They can have characteristics of a tiger or of a swan. They are the ones who come to college in their CRV or Civic.

DOG (The faithful friend)

They are the Stairway to Heaven of college creatures. They are one gem of a species. They are friendly, helpful, caring, affectionate etc. etc. They are the one who will cheer you up when you are down. They will lend you money even when they themselves don’t have it. They will socialize with anyone and everyone. They are extremely popular and are the life of any campus.

DONKEY (The useless hard-worker)

These are the ones who study for 4 hours everyday and still are in the bottom half of the merit list. They go to gym for months (to loose some weight) and end up gaining weight. They always curse God, system and anything they can think of, but it’s never their fault.

TORTOISE WITH WINGS (The winner)

They are complete opposite of Donkeys. They also work hard but are also rewarded for it. They are good in anything they do.

RABBIT (The multiplier)

Usually, a couple belonging to this species is found in vacant class-rooms, empty corridors or a lonely corner. A few brave couples don’t mind doing their things out in the open. They indulge in activities, which virtually everyone enjoys watching alone but label it as cheap and tacky when they are accompanied by someone. They are always on the radar of gossipmongers.

RAT (The Desperate)

The biggest dream of a rat is to become a rabbit one day. The sex ratio of this species is heavily distorted. There are only 56 females for every 1000 males. They want to get into a relationship anyhow and lead a life of a typical rabbit. They have an extremely high failure rate with more than 93% of the population fail to achieve their primary objective.

Note: The first five species are based on personality types and is what I call the major. Nearly everyone of us belong to anyone of the five. Next four are more behaviour oriented and are called the minor. These, generally, varies with time. For example a person can be both a donkey and a tortoise at different points of times. Also, a major and a minor are not mutually exclusive. Infact, they are complimentary. A Lion can also be rat, or a Dog can also be a tortoise.

So here is the Zillion Rupee question. Which one are you?

As you all know, I am from Madhya Pradesh the land of Khajuraho temples, I can screw you guys in more ways than you can count. So, dare not criticise it.

God Bless  :)